it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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