I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
