No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
