i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
