you would pick up someone in the library
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
