i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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