I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
