Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
