That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
