But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
