I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
