I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
