Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
