you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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