You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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