i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
