why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
cat food counts as protein by the way
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Everclear isn't food dammit
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
