So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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