How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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