arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
