new low.... made out with someone while peeing
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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