blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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