It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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