Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
This is my gift to your gina
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Randomize