weddingsv make me drug and hornr
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
