that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
