U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize