so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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