This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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