Quick, to the slutcave!
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize