Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
The struggles of a small town man whore
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
