Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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