You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Randomize