I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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