we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
