So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
