So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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