I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
