They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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