I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize