You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
