Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.

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(602): View more from Arizona

dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.

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(636): View more from Missouri

she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.

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(914): View more from New York

i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one

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(206): View more from Washington

I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.

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(406): View more from Montana

Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.

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(804): View more from Virginia

Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love

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