I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Where is the hickey?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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