just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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