we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
