I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
