I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Randomize
