Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
