Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
