i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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