Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
